this last week has ben hell
explination?
well im moving out on friday
i love him... but he is so distant latley
grampas funeral is on thursday (2 days from now)

last things first
My grampa was hit by a truck on sunday night.
im still in shock.

who is he?
wouldnt you like to know.
im trying not to bother him when he is busy. these last few days i have been upset and needing a friend.
thats what i have noticed
whwnever i really need a friend
some are busy
some just dont respond...
and some try and use it as an oppertunity
cause
fuck

this is the conversation went

guy "im really sorry for your loss. anything i can do at all to help ;) take your mind off things?"
me "what do you mean by that?"

in the end he tried to get in my pants

i know i am decent looking
suposidly im seductive

but im still human
so treat me like one

uh...
moving out
so my parents gave me a choice
no computers
tv
hanging out
dating
cellphone
life

the only way i could date was if they got to see his transcripts
im sorry.
but no
just
no.


i dont know what to do sometimes
do i give up?
follow his advice?
i cant
even though...
its probably right

i have noticed that i can be on msn and facebook almost all day... and not get a single message
from anyone
its times like this...
when im allready upset
that i feel truley alone
like no one really cares.

what do you do when everything changes?
dont know what anything is anymore
dont know whats right
am i making the right choice?
huge step eh?
choices are:
live at home, no dating, computers, tv, friends, phone...
or move
my mum called me a sex addicted alchoholic...
what do you say to that?
comment please!