this is who i am.
what i have become
i cant change some things
like myself... to some extent.
i cant change the good or bad
and i cant try to force it
because forcing it makes it come back... way worse
am i talking nonsence?
maybe.
but i know what im saying.

i need to face my fears.
because i cant get any betetr without doing so.

you helped me take a few steps, but i need to be willing to take those steps, and some steps i need to take alone... because i need to catch myself... or let the past repeat itself.

i cant take advice well...
especially relationship advice
because i am stuborn
it took me an entire day to learn how to tie my shoes...
cause i was way too stuborn.
i am going to prove you wrong if you tell me something wont work relationship wise... at least in some cases

im better
somewhat
im determined
im not sure why
but i WILL make things better
i wont let fear over ride me
i wont let myself fall to the darkness
i wont let myself give up
because this time im gonna make it worth it
this time im going to make what you did count.
because i need to

im afraid
but we all are

afraid what will happen

but we wont get anywhere if we dont face our fears.

ive been lost in the darkness... uncontrolable...
but its getting easier to draw back out of it.


a few years ago the main reason i didnt kill myself was my parents.
now ive got you guys...

This is who i am
determined/stuborn
good/evil
light/dark
an optimistic pessimist,
a poet
a singer
a horn player
a friend
a soul
a live
yet another striving to survive

i dont know if i will make it
but i cant let the doubt make sure i dont

i worry
i doubt
way too much

but for once i know who i am
did i not before?
i did kinda, but i forced myself to hide myself.

yes im listening to pokemon
what are you going to do about it.
i enjoy it
so what if its immature
i will find something you will like
and get you to listen to it.
because im gonna prove to you that some things are not all bad.


yin and yang
both balance out

think about it

SHADOWSTICH
yea-yeah